Seeing how some of you guys have written what you look for in a girl, and thanking girls for their modesty, and consideration of you. Now I wish to do the same for you guys in this post.
I know it seems every girl wants a handsome guy, with huge muscles. "Tall, dark and handsome" has been "the perfect guy" for as long as I can remember. But *NEWS FLASH* girls are silly.
Really, it doesn't matter to most of us what your hair color, height or build is. If those things do matter a great deal to a girl, she's one of the flighty sort. Real women don't care so much about those things.
I personally find it annoying when guys are more interested in being "ripped" than what work they are doing for the Kingdom.
What we girls really want in a guy is someone who really loves God with everything in him. Someone who loves God above even her. Because a man that loves God, and is actively serving Him will treat her with love and respect, because she is a daughter of the King he serves.
A man who is actively seeking God's face, and doing His Kingdom work. A man who is really trying to reform the culture, not just talking about it.
A man who loves children enough to invest time in teaching them, and when able letting them work along side of him in the Kingdom work.
And guys, just so you know. We notice the way you treat your mother and sisters. If you act as if your real sisters are silly, and not worth spending much time with, or you don't respect them as ladies; you won't treat us, your sisters in Christ, and (one of us,) your future wife any better.
If you don't respect your mother, or listen to her counsel; you won't respect one of us, your future wife, or heed what we say when we see harm coming your way.
Also, I've seen many times, where guys have said things about girls talking too much. We do, far too much. I admit. (I'm probably the worst in that department) But we also love to hear you guys talk. We love to just listen to you, when you're joking, or talking about things we don't always understand (such as mechanics) but most of all when you are talking about Kingdom work, and how to do it. There's nothing more edifying (in my opinion at least) than hearing you guys talking about the work of the Kingdom, and your dreams for the future that revolve around it.
Let me tell you right now. It speaks volumes when you treat us like ladies. When you go out of your way to guard our hearts. As you know, guys run on logic (mostly), girls run on emotions (mostly); it's very hard to keep those emotions in check. And in a culture where girls hearts are trampled so much, and treated like trash, and not worth guarding... it's very refreshing to see guys who really care about that, and will be careful of it.
So many guys anymore try to win a girls heart, then once he has it, he abuses it. Please, don't ever be like that. Girls need protectors, and we are ever so grateful when you are mindful of that, and stand up like a man in our defense.
While many have the idea that all women want is a man's time and money; that's not the case.
We want a man we can work along side of, and be his helpmeet. We want a man we can fully back in his work, and that we can support. If you lack integrity, and the back bone to make a stand for right; you can't expect to find a girl that would come along side and support you. We want a man that is striving to be like Christ, and that we can walk along side of on his journey to godliness.
So many men these days talk about how silly, fickle, and draining women are. Men who make crass jokes about us, and talk about us as tho' we are all the feminist kind.
We want men who notice the fact that some of us do try, and are going against the mainstream feminist movement.
As far as modesty... I contend that always flaunting your muscles, and going shirtless is just as immodest, and disgusting as a girl running around in a miniskirt and tight strapless top.
Just like a girl is to hide things from the neck down so as not to cause any one of you to stumble; men need to hide things from the neck down for the same reason.
In the circles I've grown up in, the standard for modesty has been, nothing above the knee, or more than a hand-breadth below the collar bone is to be left bare.
So it should be for guys.
Just as it causes your minds to go in wrong places when you see a scantily clad woman; it causes our minds to go wrong places when we see shirtless men.
I know in the summer it gets hot, and it may be much cooler to work without a shirt. But consider the girls who are trying to keep themselves pure for the one man God intended for them, driving through town, or doing the weekly shopping, and everywhere they turn, there are half naked men walking around. It is very difficult as it is, to resist the pressures from other girls who aren't careful with their dress; it just makes it harder when men aren't fully dressed when ladies are present.
And please understand, it's not your looks that we care about. Just like not all girls are pretty; not all guys are handsome. It's how we were made, and is nothing to be ashamed of.
If only pretty girls got married, or only handsome guys got married... the worlds population would be much smaller. ;)
When the heart is right, looks make no difference. Honestly, I know a lot of handsome guys, but the handsome only goes skin deep. Beyond that, they aren't anything special.
I also know a lot of guys that couldn't be classed as handsome, but when you get to know their heart, they look better. Honest.
What's in the heart shows on the face.
If your heart is right. If you are striving to be like Christ, your looks make no difference. The most handsome guys I know rarely get a second glance from the typical girl, because they are handsome inside.
Please, dear brothers. Stay strong in the Lord. I know there is much trash in today's culture. There are so few real men, that it makes it harder for the few of you left to make a stand. But never give up! You have a host of sisters who are ready and willing to support you in the right, if you'll only stand up and fight.
We girls so appreciate it when you make an effort in this age of laziness. We're ready to back you, and encourage you in the fight.
1 Timothy 6:12
Fight the good fight of faith, lay hold on eternal life, whereunto thou art also called, and hast professed a good profession before many witnesses.
Joshua 1:9
Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.
Thank you for making a stand, striving to be like Christ, and being considerate of us girls. :)
Your grateful sister in Christ,
Hallie
Thank you Hallie!! It is so very encouraging and a breath of fresh air to read this post!!
ReplyDelete(At times like this I wish I was better at expressing my thoughts and feelings in words.)
Thank *you* Andrew. :) Glad this post could be an encouragement to you. :D
DeleteThere's no need to wish you could express your thoughts better, what you said already is special. :)
Stand strong dear brother. :)
Thankyou for sharing this post, Hallie. I agree with many of the points you brought up. :)
ReplyDeleteI will mention that I think "prettiness" and "handsomeness" is relative. To say that not everyone is pretty or handsome is only based on one person's opinion. Every person is beautiful to God, and I think every single person on the planet is pretty/handsome to someone. However I think you probably covered that in your comment about the heart. I agree entirely there; a beautiful heart makes a beautiful face. :)
Thanks girl. :D
DeleteI didn't say that bit quite right, did I... sorry about that. You're right, everyone is pretty/handsome in their own way. :) Just, some are more so inside than out. :)