That's right. A Princess.
Now, before anyone laughs at this observation, let me tell you what I mean in saying it.
Since we have been redeemed through the blood of Christ, are we not God's children? Is He not King over all?
Aren't children of earthly kings called either a Prince or a Princess? As children of the One True King, are we not then either a Prince or a Princess?
We are? You're sure of that? Good. Then let us proceed....
How are children of earthly kings expected to behave themselves?
First of all, I should think, since they bare the royal family name, and at least one is being prepared to one day take the throne, they are not allowed to break the laws of the realm, and do as they please simply because they are royalty.
This seems to be a common misconception (at least among Americans ) that royalty can do whatever they please, and no one can tell them no since they are in fact royalty, and have final say.
How often we forget how many kings have been put to death for breaking their own laws.
With that in mind, why do we, as children of the Almighty God, King of all the universe, think we are ever justified in not following His laws, and living in a manner that brings more honor to the Royal family name of Christian?
As children of the Almighty King, surely we have more reason to live honorably. Surely ours is the greater weight of responsibility?
Romans 8:17
And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with Him, that we may be also glorified together.
There are ever so many things I could talk about on this subject, but the other points will be covered in future posts. So let this suffice for now.
Keep in mind who you are as a child of Almighty God, a son or daughter of The King, and live accordingly. Read the letter (Bible) He has given you, and follow His instructions. They will never lead you wrong.
Should you go wrong, remember He is not only King of all, but a loving Father, who is ready and willing to forgive those who are repentant and willing to give up sin in exchange for His glory, and bringing more honor to His spotless name.
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Sunday, March 16, 2014
Let It Go
The song Let It Go from Disney's Frozen has taken the world by storm. Or so it seems.
Everyone seems to be singing it, many have been recording it themselves, and the rest of us are doomed to having it stuck in our heads. I have heard it many times, and don't like it. Many have tried to explain to me how it is a good song, and perfectly acceptable, but it still doesn't set right with me. Some may think I'm too hard on it, or judging it too much... but I see it as a dangerous song, and herein I shall attempt to explain the reason why.
"The snow glows white on the mountain tonight,
not a footprint to be seen.
A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I'm the queen.
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside.
Couldn't keep it in, Heaven knows I tried.
Don't let them in, don't let them see.
Be the good girl you always have to be.
Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know.
Well now they know!"
So far not much trouble. She seems to be lamenting a mistake made. Except that last line... that's where the rebellion comes into her voice.
"Let it go, let it go!
Can't hold it back any more.
Let it go, let it go!
Turn away and slam the door.
I don't care what they're going to say.
Let the storm rage on.
The cold never bothered me anyway."
So whatever it was she was supposed to keep in, that got out... she is now yelling out in rebellion, saying she doesn't care. She's going to "turn away and slam the door"... Rather than making right the wrong she was just lamenting - she is now walking out on responsibility.
And, if what she did wasn't wrong, then she made it wrong by walking out instead of standing up and doing what was needed.
Correct me if I'm wrong - but doesn't wrong doing - or at the very least, messing up "slightly"- require repentance and making it right? Would it not be wrong to suddenly blurt out in frustration/anger about something and walk out, shunning responsibility?
"It's funny how some distance,
makes everything seem small.
And the fears that once controlled me, can't get to me at all
It's time to see what I can do,
to test the limits and break through.
No right, no wrong, no rules for me.
I'm free!"
Ah, here we go. Being free from fears is not at all wrong... but being free from rules, right and wrong, now there's the problem.
Wrong is defined as sin, and sin is defined as lawlessness, the law being the law of God.
John 8:32
And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
Romans 8:2
For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death.
"Let it go, let it go.
I am one with the wind and sky.
Let it go, let it go.
You'll never see me cry.
Here I'll stand, and here I'll stay.
Let the storm rage on."
So now, after openly declaring her rebellion, she is stubbornly "standing her ground" in rebellion.
Proverbs 17:11
An evil man seeketh only rebellion: therefore a cruel messenger shall be sent against him.
"My power flurries through the air into the ground.
My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast
I'm never going back; the past is in the past!"
Here's another problem with the song that I have yet to see anyone even attempt to explain away... "My power" and she's building a castle of ice without a single tool... it's all with the waving of her arms. That my friends, no matter how you want to view it, is witchcraft.
Galatians 5:19-21
Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,
Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.
"Let it go, let it go.
And I'll rise like the break of dawn.
Let it go, let it go
That perfect girl is gone
Here I stand, in the light of day.
Let the storm rage on!
The cold never bothered me anyway...."
The whole song is about her or, for the others who are picking up on the song, it's about "me" what "I" can do, what "I" think is best, what "I" want. It's not about helping others, it's not about serving the Almighty Creator. It's about "me".
Now I know what some are going to say. "The song is out of context. It's not about rebellion if you have it in context" Alright, I'll grant that. But if you need context to understand that it isn't rebellious or selfish, then why is the song being taken out of context and sung all around the world? Why are there video clips, and recordings of the song by itself?
Rebellion is something sinful human nature gravitates to. If this song is only good in context, but not alone, then it shouldn't be listened to, and especially shouldn't be being endorsed by Christians, or those who profess to be Christians.
Our culture is a shambles already, and this song is only drawing people deeper into rebellion which isn't doing anything toward cultural reform.
This song may be alright in context (which I find hard to believe, but will grant it for sake of argument having never seen the movie) but it is being taken out of context, and being endorsed, when lyrically, it encourages sin in all who hear it. This is not pleasing to God, and least of all, when coming from His children.
Philippians 4:8
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
There is no virtue expressed, or even mentioned in this song. In which case I say - Let it go.
Everyone seems to be singing it, many have been recording it themselves, and the rest of us are doomed to having it stuck in our heads. I have heard it many times, and don't like it. Many have tried to explain to me how it is a good song, and perfectly acceptable, but it still doesn't set right with me. Some may think I'm too hard on it, or judging it too much... but I see it as a dangerous song, and herein I shall attempt to explain the reason why.
"The snow glows white on the mountain tonight,
not a footprint to be seen.
A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I'm the queen.
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside.
Couldn't keep it in, Heaven knows I tried.
Don't let them in, don't let them see.
Be the good girl you always have to be.
Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know.
Well now they know!"
So far not much trouble. She seems to be lamenting a mistake made. Except that last line... that's where the rebellion comes into her voice.
"Let it go, let it go!
Can't hold it back any more.
Let it go, let it go!
Turn away and slam the door.
I don't care what they're going to say.
Let the storm rage on.
The cold never bothered me anyway."
So whatever it was she was supposed to keep in, that got out... she is now yelling out in rebellion, saying she doesn't care. She's going to "turn away and slam the door"... Rather than making right the wrong she was just lamenting - she is now walking out on responsibility.
And, if what she did wasn't wrong, then she made it wrong by walking out instead of standing up and doing what was needed.
Correct me if I'm wrong - but doesn't wrong doing - or at the very least, messing up "slightly"- require repentance and making it right? Would it not be wrong to suddenly blurt out in frustration/anger about something and walk out, shunning responsibility?
"It's funny how some distance,
makes everything seem small.
And the fears that once controlled me, can't get to me at all
It's time to see what I can do,
to test the limits and break through.
No right, no wrong, no rules for me.
I'm free!"
Ah, here we go. Being free from fears is not at all wrong... but being free from rules, right and wrong, now there's the problem.
Wrong is defined as sin, and sin is defined as lawlessness, the law being the law of God.
1 John 3:4
Whosoever committeth sin transgresseth also the law: for sin is the transgression of the law.
As for being free... freedom is not found in rebellion. Never has been.
John 8:32
And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.
Romans 8:2
For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death.
"Let it go, let it go.
I am one with the wind and sky.
Let it go, let it go.
You'll never see me cry.
Here I'll stand, and here I'll stay.
Let the storm rage on."
So now, after openly declaring her rebellion, she is stubbornly "standing her ground" in rebellion.
Proverbs 17:11
An evil man seeketh only rebellion: therefore a cruel messenger shall be sent against him.
"My power flurries through the air into the ground.
My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast
I'm never going back; the past is in the past!"
Here's another problem with the song that I have yet to see anyone even attempt to explain away... "My power" and she's building a castle of ice without a single tool... it's all with the waving of her arms. That my friends, no matter how you want to view it, is witchcraft.
Galatians 5:19-21
Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,
Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.
"Let it go, let it go.
And I'll rise like the break of dawn.
Let it go, let it go
That perfect girl is gone
Here I stand, in the light of day.
Let the storm rage on!
The cold never bothered me anyway...."
The whole song is about her or, for the others who are picking up on the song, it's about "me" what "I" can do, what "I" think is best, what "I" want. It's not about helping others, it's not about serving the Almighty Creator. It's about "me".
Now I know what some are going to say. "The song is out of context. It's not about rebellion if you have it in context" Alright, I'll grant that. But if you need context to understand that it isn't rebellious or selfish, then why is the song being taken out of context and sung all around the world? Why are there video clips, and recordings of the song by itself?
Rebellion is something sinful human nature gravitates to. If this song is only good in context, but not alone, then it shouldn't be listened to, and especially shouldn't be being endorsed by Christians, or those who profess to be Christians.
Our culture is a shambles already, and this song is only drawing people deeper into rebellion which isn't doing anything toward cultural reform.
This song may be alright in context (which I find hard to believe, but will grant it for sake of argument having never seen the movie) but it is being taken out of context, and being endorsed, when lyrically, it encourages sin in all who hear it. This is not pleasing to God, and least of all, when coming from His children.
Philippians 4:8
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
There is no virtue expressed, or even mentioned in this song. In which case I say - Let it go.
Monday, February 24, 2014
Unsung Hero
He doesn't go about slaying dragons, or fighting big glorious battles, riding home on his white charger and galloping off into the sunset with his bride.
This is a different sort of hero. A special sort. Very special.
This hero fights his battles inside. Unseen, unheard of, hard battles. By himself.
He has no white charger.
This hero fights hard, inner battles.
This hero gets up, goes to work, battles rush hour traffic, fights his temper, puts up with insults, ridicule, and filth from people at work, on the road, and in the store.
This hero doesn't have the finest armor, and often it doesn't shine.
This hero doesn't say much. He doesn't talk about his battles. He fights them alone. Not always because of pride, but because there is no one willing to help him fight.
He fights alone because he fears he is the only one that feels the wounds. And these wounds are deep...
This hero often will not say it, but he doesn't do well with being ridiculed, and laughed at; so he avoids it as much as possible.
He is constantly harassed, and wounded. Beaten down for every little advance he makes. Often discouraged from the fight.
So often he turns his weary steps homeward, looking for comfort and relief.... when he comes home he's tired, worn out, and bone weary.... and there's no cheerful face to greet him at the door.
Sometimes his princess wants to go somewhere, wants him to help clean the castle, and help make supper.
This is a different sort of hero. A special sort. Very special.
This hero fights his battles inside. Unseen, unheard of, hard battles. By himself.
He has no white charger.
This hero fights hard, inner battles.
This hero gets up, goes to work, battles rush hour traffic, fights his temper, puts up with insults, ridicule, and filth from people at work, on the road, and in the store.
This hero doesn't have the finest armor, and often it doesn't shine.
This hero doesn't say much. He doesn't talk about his battles. He fights them alone. Not always because of pride, but because there is no one willing to help him fight.
He fights alone because he fears he is the only one that feels the wounds. And these wounds are deep...
This hero often will not say it, but he doesn't do well with being ridiculed, and laughed at; so he avoids it as much as possible.
He is constantly harassed, and wounded. Beaten down for every little advance he makes. Often discouraged from the fight.
So often he turns his weary steps homeward, looking for comfort and relief.... when he comes home he's tired, worn out, and bone weary.... and there's no cheerful face to greet him at the door.
His princess doesn't run out to meet him, and usher him in as a victor.
Most of the time it's as if he had no princess, and was returning to an empty, war torn castle.
Often times sadly, his princess is not understanding of him, and says things that hurt him. Like putting salt in his wounds....
His princess gets upset with him when he comes home discouraged. She gets upset when he says he's tired, because after all, he got to go somewhere, when she was "cooped up" in the castle all day.
Often his princess doesn't praise him for the victories he gained that day. She doesn't encourage him, and build him up for the next day's hard battle.
Instead, she says things to belittle him; cutting things.
He does this day in, and day out. Every day he's up and facing the foes again. Often feeling inadequate, discouraged, and out of strength. He's not yet healed from yesterday's battles when it's time for today's battles. It's been that way for years.
He fights these battles - knowing he'll lose many of them - because he loves her.
He goes out day after day, with little to no help or encouragement - because he loves her.
He musters what little strength he has left and fights on, tho' he's wounded and bleeding - because he loves her. Because he wants to protect her, he wants to care for her, and because she means the world to him.
The wounds she gives him hurt more than those received in battle, because she's the one that matters to him, she is the one he looks to for healing and comfort. And often he looks to her in vain.
She wounds him deeply, almost daily... but he doesn't say anything - because he loves her.
Often times he wants to say something; he wants to tell her how it hurts... but he doesn't know how to, much of the time. And even when he does know how, he often doesn't - because he doesn't want to hurt her.
Thus he continues on alone, wounded, and out of strength; fighting battles that are more than can be fought alone.
It's this that makes him a hero... he goes on.
He continues on, fighting for what he believes is right even when there is little, or no support.
He goes on serving his God, and caring for his princess even when it all seems pointless, and for naught.
"This hero" is not just one man, but many..... our fathers, brothers, husbands, cousins and friends.
Girls. The men in our lives are far more of hero's than we like to think. And they need our love and respect. They need our support! And it goes way further than just words.... it has to be actions as well.
The guys face things on a daily basis that we often don't even think about. Hard things. And they're facing them alone because we, for the most part, don't care to pay attention. Or, maybe we do care... but we're not careful to show it.
We need to rise up in support of our hero's.
I talk to guys a lot. And with the host of different things they all face daily, the underlying problem they all seem to face, is lack of support from us girls.
We were made to support the men, so they wouldn't have to go on alone. We've neglected to fulfill the very purpose for which we were created, and they are suffering for it.
There are so many things the guys need our help with. But they - much of the time - will not mention it themselves.
Do your part, and ask your fathers, brothers, cousins, husbands and in some cases, friends what it is they need help with. They may have to think on it for a while. They're not used to offered help really; but give them time, and then no matter how small the thing they ask, do it. Sometimes it's the little things that help them most.
To all you unsung hero's out there. Thank you for what you do. We do appreciate you.
Remember this. No matter how small the victory, no matter how small a thing it is you do... You're still a hero.
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
Male/Female Friendships - A Female Perspective
Guy/girl relationships. What is appropriate, what isn't?
Here is an issue where there seems to be much confusion. While I don't pretend to know half of what there is to know on it, hopefully I can at least shed some light on it from what I've seen.
We often talk of the modesty issue, and even address the aspect of touching: Are hugs appropriate outside the family... etc. But here is an aspect that is often overlooked (to my limited knowledge): Conversation. What is appropriate between guys and girls in relation to conversation?
While these verses apply to all of life, and not only our conversation, in this particular instance I will only be applying them to how we interact through words.
Philippians 1:27-28
Only let your conversation be as it becometh the gospel of Christ: that whether I come and see you, or else be absent, I may hear of your affairs, that ye stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel;
And in nothing terrified by your adversaries: which is to them an evident token of perdition, but to you of salvation, and that of God.
Here we see that our conversation should be centered on Christ and the Kingdom work; encouraging each other and working together for His glory. “I may hear of your affairs”... Is our conversation with the opposite gender such that we have no cause to be ashamed should others hear/see it?
Hebrews 13:5
Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for He hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.
We think of covetousness as wanting things that aren’t ours… the other person’s heart is not ours - is our conversation such that it will rob the other of their heart? Are we content in the place God has us? or are we out trying to “win their heart” because we’re not content to wait on God’s timing? There is a time to work at knitting hearts together. But it is to be started by the man, and only after much prayer and serious consideration; only then can he try to “win her heart”, and only in a godly fashion.
Something that I see to be harmful (and this is spoken out of personal experience) is when a guy tells a girl that he loves her. It happens a lot (that I have seen) and while the guy may insist that it is only meant as a brother, and the girl may say it’s alright… it still causes the girl to give her heart to the guy without meaning to. As a girl who once said it was “alright”, and “I know how it’s meant”, it still caused unholy thoughts, it still caused the heart to stray in spite of efforts made against it. It still took the purity from a heart meant for one man only. This is no light matter. This is nothing to be careless with, or “make allowances” for. This is sometimes called “playing with fire” and there’s good reason for it. When all is said and done it causes great shame to one or both parties involved.
Psalm 50:23
Whoso offereth praise glorifieth me: and to him that ordereth his conversation aright will I shew the salvation of God.
How do we order our conversation aright? How do we glorify God through our conversation? Let scripture interpret scripture…
1 Timothy 5:1-2
Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren;
The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity.
This leads to another question: How do brothers and sisters treat one another? “With all purity”. What is purity?
“Purity consists of ‘clean hands’, innocence…” “Purity is related to guiltless, blameless, or innocent behavior.” “The focus is on moral purity or purification: chastity; innocence in one’s attitude toward members of the church; and moral purity or uprightness. Purity is associated with understanding, patience and kindness; speech, life, love, and faith, and reverence.”
Reverence is a high form of respect. If we truly love and reverence them, we will show that love and respect by doing our utmost to guard their heart, and to be, ourselves, blameless should their heart stray. Our conversation should be such that there is no cause for either party to stumble.
2 Corinthians 1:12
For our rejoicing is this, the testimony of our conscience, that in simplicity and godly sincerity, not with fleshly wisdom, but by the grace of God, we have had our conversation in the world, and more abundantly to you-ward.
“In simplicity and godly sincerity” this would be without empty, meaningless flattery, or over complicating things. Speaking the truth in love, and not straying from the purpose of the conversation.
“Not with fleshly wisdom, but by the grace of God” - again, Christ is to be at the center of our conversation.
“Not with fleshly wisdom” - not drawing attention to ourselves with our “wisdom”, but keeping the focus on Christ, asking for His wisdom.
Ephesians 2:3
Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.
All of us have made mistakes in the past. We have all been “fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind” through our conversation in the past. We still do it. We “were by nature the children of wrath”, but through Christ have been made the “sons of God” (1 John 3:1-2) which affects how we should conduct our conversation.
Ephesians 4:22-24
That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts;
And be renewed in the spirit of your mind;
And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.
Philippians 3:20-21
For our conversation is in heaven; from whence also we look for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ:
Who shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto His glorious body, according to the working whereby He is able even to subdue all things unto Himself.
I have heard many times in reference to young people being careless in their conversation, and being hurt because of it “that’s just how young people are, they’ll grow out of it.” This is a wrong perspective. The scriptures say differently:
1 Timothy 4:12
Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.
One is never too young to take responsibility for their actions, and also very importantly, their conversation, and strive to glorify God through it. We must be conducting our conversation in wisdom, and knowledge - going against the “normal” accepted carelessness.
James 3:13
Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom.
It is the man’s responsibility to lead the relationship and to guard the girl’s heart, but that does not lessen the responsibility of the girl to guard his heart as well. We girls have a great deal of sway over the guys, and we need to be aware of that and use it wisely.
1 Peter 3:1-2
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, as any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
For us unmarried girls it is right to “be in subjection” in so far as we do not take the lead, nor push the guys to do anything but draw nearer to God. But that is to be the extent of our subjection, until marriage.
Girls, guys largely go with what we appear to be comfortable with in a relationship. If we don’t set strict boundaries, we are causing them to stumble. If we “be nice” and make allowances for things (such as accepting terms of endearment) we are not guarding their hearts, and are in grave danger of losing our own.
Accepting terms of endearment from a man who is not (yet?) your husband is stealing what is not yours. Even if you end up marrying him later in life, you have not saved those special things for marriage. Imagine he is married, just for sake of argument: would his wife be comfortable with the way you talk? would she be alright with him saying he loves you, or calling you such things as “sweetheart” and the like? Whether we like to think about it or not, the guys we talk to are married, in that if we aren’t going to marry them, they will be marrying someone else; if we allow our conversation to go beyond the confines of “all purity” with chastity we are stealing the innocence from him that should be preserved for his future wife.
Guys. When you call us girls “sweetheart”, “doll”, “precious” etc., you are stealing little bits of our hearts. When you tell us “I love you” one on one you are not guarding our hearts, guarding our innocence, or preserving those special terms inviolate for our husbands one day. Upon the occasion of marriage those terms should be new and special, not “old hat”, and having been used to the point of not being special anymore. When you use those terms for us, you are stealing bits of our hearts, so in the event that we should marry, we can no longer give our whole heart to our husband; it is now pieced out to many others. We girls cannot simply “take back” our hearts once they have been given. Once even a small bit of our hearts have been given, the one to whom it was given has a piece of it forever. It’s how girls are, it’s how we were made. We were made to be a “help fit” for our husband one day, which means we have this natural desire to belong to a guy. And a guy that makes us feel that we belong in that way will have a part at least, if not all, of our hearts. Please be understanding of this, and be careful that you don’t steal our hearts away from our future husbands.
In closing here is a verse to keep in mind as we seek to conduct our male/female relationships in “all purity”:
Ezra 7:23
Whatsoever is commanded by the God of heaven, let it be diligently done for the house of the God of heaven: for why should there be wrath against the realm of the King and His sons?
Friday, December 6, 2013
What Does Marriage Mean?
As this subject has come up in conversation a lot anymore, I've decided to write up a real answer to the questions I get.
There are many things I've been asked, but it all comes down to one question: What do you look for in marriage?
There are many answers to this question. But since it has been presented in such a way as to ask my personal view on it, I shall attempt to answer it from my own beliefs on the matter.
I typically avoid discussion on this subject because of all the misconceptions, and faulty views expressed by others. Also because I'm not your typical female, and am not a "hopeless romantic".
To answer the fairly common question "Don't you even want to marry?": Yes. From my experience most do want to marry at some point, and I'm no exception to the rule. But I have a different view on it than most.
First of all, I am not comfortable with what I shall dub the "mushy" aspect of it that others seems to look forward to a great deal. I'm sorry, but marriage means more to me than license to kiss when ever you want to. That's a sick reason for marriage, in my opinion. (It probably doesn't help that I've never liked kisses of any kind...)
Marriage is more than just this "boy meets girl" and being twiterpated the rest of your life.
I am in no way saying that romance is awful, or not needed. Romance is needed... but it's not all it's cracked up to be. There is much more to life.
Marriage to me is a union of two congenial spirits. A merging of two harmonious minds and hearts seeking to honor and glorify God in all things, placing their love for each other second to their love for God.
So often we see others marrying someone they get along with. Someone they don't agree with all the way, but they marry anyway because they can "make it work". Often important matters are overlooked because it is believed once they're married they can work through it. This is a recipe for broken homes.
Sure, you're not going to find someone you can agree with fully on every issue. But certainly we (as a society) could stop settling for second best because "we'll never agree fully anyway".
Young ladies: What we're looking for in a husband is not some "cute guy" that is "ripped" and witty. I'm sorry, but those are hardly things that qualify someone for the duties of marriage. And the "cute" face will get old, the "ripped" figure won't stay that way forever, and the wit will become very irksome.
We also can't just go for any guy that shows interest. There has to be some harmony of spirit; some unity.
There are qualifying characteristics to look for in a guy before marriage is considered.
1) Is he actively pursuing his walk with the Lord? or is he content to say he's a Christian, but not take his position as such seriously?
2) Is he a gentleman? No, not one of those overly refined, flowery speech sort. The kind that will guard not only your heart, but those of the other young ladies he has contact with.
3) Does he know where he is going? Does he have purpose in life? Many think they are ready for marriage, but the only thing they have by way of a long term goal is getting a good paying job. There's more to life than having money and learning to jog on together after the initial excitement of getting married wears off. ,
4) Does he have solid beliefs? Is he standing firmly on the word of God in the face of opposition? Most importantly, is he living out those beliefs?
Add to that: Are you in agreement with him? Can you trust him to the point where if a matter arises that you disagree on, you can differ to him, and trust him to make a decision on it whether you think he's right or wrong? Do you share the same beliefs/thoughts/convictions, enough that you can trust him to make right choices on any subject, knowing he will do his utmost to bring glory to God through it?
5) Does he have the same goal in life as you? One can't marry a person, having different vocations/callings in life and expect for the marriage to not suffer as a result.
Young men: You are looking for more in a wife than a pretty face, fine figure, and witty tongue. One day that pretty face will wrinkle, the fine figure will change, and the witty tongue will get tiresome.
Something I see happen a lot. Guys often will overlook a gem of a girl who isn't a "raving beauty", and marry a "raving beauty" who is shallow, and a flirt. Guys, I know you're driven by sight more than girls are... but please don't pass over the dull looking treasure for the shiny bit of trash flashing at you.
Granted, there are beautiful girls, inside and out. But there are more that are only beautiful outside, and that beauty doesn't last long.
Things young men look for in a wife:
1) Is she actively pursuing her relationship with Christ? Not a Christian in name only; having no idea of how to live out her faith. Is she studying to better herself, and to be prepared for what the future may hold?
2) Does she guard her heart? Is she careful to not capture the attention of other young men for sake of liking the attention? Is she striving to always be a lady, and being considerate of the guys around her? Controlling her tongue?
3) Does she have purpose in life? Do her goals and desires go beyond that of getting married one day?
4) Does she respect authority? Will she submit to you even on matters whereon you disagree? Will she support you in your calling? Is she forgiving? Women have a tendency to "throw it in your face" every time you make a mistake. Is she willing to overlook your shortcomings, and encourage you to be a better man?
5) Is she content with where God has her? or is she restless and always wanting something different?
A well matched couple will have harmony of thoughts, unity of mind and spirit, and an understanding between them unmatched by their acquaintances. There should be perfect kinship. A desire to glorify God together, through their vocation.
If there is no unity before marriage, it's pretty safe to say there won't be any afterward either.
Marriage is more than just an attraction between a man and a woman. It's two people seeking to better serve God together in unity.
Few of us know anyone with which we have such unity. But whether we know someone like that or not, we should begin now to pray for the other, and ask God to cause you to have that Christian unity when it is His time.
We would have far less broken homes if we put more prayer into marriage before it happens.
A Christian Home
O give us homes built firm upon the Savior,
Where Christ is Head and Counselor and Guide;
Where ev'ry child is taught His love and favor
And gives his heart to Christ the crucified:
How sweet to know that tho' his foot-steps waver
His faithful Lord is walking by his side!
O give us homes with godly fathers, mothers,
Who always place their hope and trust in Him;
Whose tender patience turmoil never bothers,
Whose calm and courage trouble cannot dim;
A home where each finds joy in serving others,
And love still shines, tho' days be dark and grim.
O give us homes where Christ is Lord and Master,
The Bible read, the precious hymns still sung;
Where pray'r comes first in peace or in disaster,
And praise is natural speech to ev'ry tongue;
Where mountains move before a faith that's vaster,
And Christ sufficient is for old and young.
O Lord, our God, our homes are Thine forever!
We trust to Thee their problems, toil, and care;
Their bonds of love no enemy can sever
If Thou are always Lord and Master there:
Be Thou the center of our least endeavor -
Be Thou our Guest, our hearts and homes to share.
There are many things I've been asked, but it all comes down to one question: What do you look for in marriage?
There are many answers to this question. But since it has been presented in such a way as to ask my personal view on it, I shall attempt to answer it from my own beliefs on the matter.
I typically avoid discussion on this subject because of all the misconceptions, and faulty views expressed by others. Also because I'm not your typical female, and am not a "hopeless romantic".
To answer the fairly common question "Don't you even want to marry?": Yes. From my experience most do want to marry at some point, and I'm no exception to the rule. But I have a different view on it than most.
First of all, I am not comfortable with what I shall dub the "mushy" aspect of it that others seems to look forward to a great deal. I'm sorry, but marriage means more to me than license to kiss when ever you want to. That's a sick reason for marriage, in my opinion. (It probably doesn't help that I've never liked kisses of any kind...)
Marriage is more than just this "boy meets girl" and being twiterpated the rest of your life.
I am in no way saying that romance is awful, or not needed. Romance is needed... but it's not all it's cracked up to be. There is much more to life.
Marriage to me is a union of two congenial spirits. A merging of two harmonious minds and hearts seeking to honor and glorify God in all things, placing their love for each other second to their love for God.
So often we see others marrying someone they get along with. Someone they don't agree with all the way, but they marry anyway because they can "make it work". Often important matters are overlooked because it is believed once they're married they can work through it. This is a recipe for broken homes.
Sure, you're not going to find someone you can agree with fully on every issue. But certainly we (as a society) could stop settling for second best because "we'll never agree fully anyway".
Young ladies: What we're looking for in a husband is not some "cute guy" that is "ripped" and witty. I'm sorry, but those are hardly things that qualify someone for the duties of marriage. And the "cute" face will get old, the "ripped" figure won't stay that way forever, and the wit will become very irksome.
We also can't just go for any guy that shows interest. There has to be some harmony of spirit; some unity.
There are qualifying characteristics to look for in a guy before marriage is considered.
1) Is he actively pursuing his walk with the Lord? or is he content to say he's a Christian, but not take his position as such seriously?
2) Is he a gentleman? No, not one of those overly refined, flowery speech sort. The kind that will guard not only your heart, but those of the other young ladies he has contact with.
3) Does he know where he is going? Does he have purpose in life? Many think they are ready for marriage, but the only thing they have by way of a long term goal is getting a good paying job. There's more to life than having money and learning to jog on together after the initial excitement of getting married wears off. ,
4) Does he have solid beliefs? Is he standing firmly on the word of God in the face of opposition? Most importantly, is he living out those beliefs?
Add to that: Are you in agreement with him? Can you trust him to the point where if a matter arises that you disagree on, you can differ to him, and trust him to make a decision on it whether you think he's right or wrong? Do you share the same beliefs/thoughts/convictions, enough that you can trust him to make right choices on any subject, knowing he will do his utmost to bring glory to God through it?
5) Does he have the same goal in life as you? One can't marry a person, having different vocations/callings in life and expect for the marriage to not suffer as a result.
Young men: You are looking for more in a wife than a pretty face, fine figure, and witty tongue. One day that pretty face will wrinkle, the fine figure will change, and the witty tongue will get tiresome.
Something I see happen a lot. Guys often will overlook a gem of a girl who isn't a "raving beauty", and marry a "raving beauty" who is shallow, and a flirt. Guys, I know you're driven by sight more than girls are... but please don't pass over the dull looking treasure for the shiny bit of trash flashing at you.
Granted, there are beautiful girls, inside and out. But there are more that are only beautiful outside, and that beauty doesn't last long.
Things young men look for in a wife:
1) Is she actively pursuing her relationship with Christ? Not a Christian in name only; having no idea of how to live out her faith. Is she studying to better herself, and to be prepared for what the future may hold?
2) Does she guard her heart? Is she careful to not capture the attention of other young men for sake of liking the attention? Is she striving to always be a lady, and being considerate of the guys around her? Controlling her tongue?
3) Does she have purpose in life? Do her goals and desires go beyond that of getting married one day?
4) Does she respect authority? Will she submit to you even on matters whereon you disagree? Will she support you in your calling? Is she forgiving? Women have a tendency to "throw it in your face" every time you make a mistake. Is she willing to overlook your shortcomings, and encourage you to be a better man?
5) Is she content with where God has her? or is she restless and always wanting something different?
A well matched couple will have harmony of thoughts, unity of mind and spirit, and an understanding between them unmatched by their acquaintances. There should be perfect kinship. A desire to glorify God together, through their vocation.
If there is no unity before marriage, it's pretty safe to say there won't be any afterward either.
Marriage is more than just an attraction between a man and a woman. It's two people seeking to better serve God together in unity.
Few of us know anyone with which we have such unity. But whether we know someone like that or not, we should begin now to pray for the other, and ask God to cause you to have that Christian unity when it is His time.
We would have far less broken homes if we put more prayer into marriage before it happens.
A Christian Home
O give us homes built firm upon the Savior,
Where Christ is Head and Counselor and Guide;
Where ev'ry child is taught His love and favor
And gives his heart to Christ the crucified:
How sweet to know that tho' his foot-steps waver
His faithful Lord is walking by his side!
O give us homes with godly fathers, mothers,
Who always place their hope and trust in Him;
Whose tender patience turmoil never bothers,
Whose calm and courage trouble cannot dim;
A home where each finds joy in serving others,
And love still shines, tho' days be dark and grim.
O give us homes where Christ is Lord and Master,
The Bible read, the precious hymns still sung;
Where pray'r comes first in peace or in disaster,
And praise is natural speech to ev'ry tongue;
Where mountains move before a faith that's vaster,
And Christ sufficient is for old and young.
O Lord, our God, our homes are Thine forever!
We trust to Thee their problems, toil, and care;
Their bonds of love no enemy can sever
If Thou are always Lord and Master there:
Be Thou the center of our least endeavor -
Be Thou our Guest, our hearts and homes to share.
Friday, November 22, 2013
What Am I Doing?
Yes, the title is a legitimate question. (just in case you were wondering) Here's why...
Ever since I was little I've had a burden for guys. I've had a burden to help them, be a comfort to them, be a sister to them.... but in wanting to be those things, I didn't bother to learn how to be any of those things.
It has become more and more evident to me how crucial the role of a woman is in the Kingdom. It bothers me more and more to see the way our role as women is being abused... not by the men - it's us women abusing it.
I've always had a dislike for the way girls carry on so about the silliest things.... (I know, I do it often *is working on that*) so my way of getting away from it was to go out and "be one of the guys" playing tag, football, you name it. My solution to the problem I saw, was to shirk my duty as a young lady and try to be a boy.
Getting into my teens, I saw that being "one of the guys" as far as playing their rough games probably wasn't the best idea... so I got to the place of just talking to them as if I was one of them. Thinking that it would somehow be an encouragement to them.... had another think coming.
It began to dawn on me that just talking to the guys as if I were one of them wasn't doing a lick of good. Guys need girls to be girls. Not men.
By being tough and unfeeling we don't do them any good. So I went to the extreme of being "soft" to the point of not standing up for what I know to be right. Not holding to strict standards in conversation... which is almost more harmful than trying to be a guy. And in the process hurt some people, and was myself, deeply hurt by others.
What is it to be a true woman.... by God's standard? What attributes does a godly woman have? What am I doing?
1) Sobriety.
1 Timothy 2:9-10
In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
Sorry, but silliness isn't needed. Sure, it's fun to goof off at times. But when it's all the time, that's when it becomes a problem. But we need to understand there is a difference between silly, and levity.
Levity is having good, clean, honest fun. Truly enjoying yourself, with others if the situation allows for it, but not dependent on the presence of others.
Silliness is obnoxious. It's overbearing. It's often disgusting.
2 Timothy 3:5-7
Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.
For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,
Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
I'm sorry, but that doesn't sound appealing to me... which brings me to the next point.
2) Knowledge.
Proverbs 1:5-7
A wise man will hear, and will increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels:
To understand a proverb, and the interpretation; the words of the wise, and their dark sayings.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.
Being a lady doesn't mean sitting aside looking pretty, not bothering our "pretty heads" with anything other than the latest gossip. We're wives and mothers in training. (some have made it through training and are now putting what they've learned into practice)
Our homes are a shambles ladies: and we're to blame. No, we can't blame it on the last generation. We can't say "If Mom had been a better mom" or "Mom never taught me that" big whoop. Chances are your mom didn't know about it to teach you. It's called "due diligence" look in the Bible, find what your role as a woman is, and learn it. No one can make you learn anything. It has to be you.
The way women are today is our problem. We can't wait for others to get their act together; we need to get our act together. To go on as is isn't fair to the guys, and it's not pleasing to God.
Proverbs 2:3-6
Yea, if thou criest after knowledge, and liftest up thy voice for understanding;
If thou seekest her as silver, and searchest for her as for hid treasures;
Then shalt thou understand the fear of the Lord, and find the knowledge of God.
For the Lord giveth wisdom: out of His mouth cometh knowledge and understanding.
3) Wisdom.
Proverbs 4:7
Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.
Proverbs 2:1-2
My son, if thou wilt receive my words, and hide my commandments with thee;
So that thou incline thine ear unto wisdom, and apply thine heart to understanding;
Proverbs 1:2-4
To know wisdom and instruction; to perceive the words of understanding;
To receive the instruction of wisdom, justice, and judgement, and equity;
To give subtilty to the simple, to the young man knowledge and discretion.
Proverbs 7:4
Say unto wisdom, Thou art my sister; and call understanding thy kinswoman:
Knowledge is great.... but utterly useless without the wisdom to use it. Wisdom is something that is greatly lacking in today's society. Let's not add to the problem.
Proverbs 3:7
Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the Lord, and depart from evil.
4) Understanding.
Proverbs 2:9-11
Then shalt thou understand righteousness, and judgment, and equity; yea, every good path.
When wisdom entereth into thine heart, and knowledge is pleasant unto thy soul;
Discretion shall preserve thee, understanding shall keep thee:
Proverbs 3:3-5
Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart:
So shalt thou find favor and good understanding in the sight of God and man.
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
We can better serve the Father when we understand our surroundings. We can't fight a battle we don't understand.
5) Submission.
Ephesians 5:22
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Colossians 3:18
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
What about those of us who aren't married yet? Does this mean we can do whatever we want until we're married?
All those rebellious wives you see around you.... started out as rebellions daughters. Likewise, most faithful wives you see, started out as faithful daughters.
As daughters we need to practice submission, by submitting to our Dad's. No matter what sort of "quirky" ideas he has... what makes you think your husband won't have similar quirks?
6) Instruction.
Part of submission is accepting instruction....
Proverbs 1:8-9
My son; hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother:
For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck.
I could go on forever about all this... there is so much to know. So much to learn. So much to do.
I'm tired of going from one extreme to the other. I'm tired of hurting people, and being hurt, because I didn't hold myself to the highest standards, or hold the guy to strict boundaries because I didn't think about it. One can not go through life mindlessly going with the flow... there is so much more to life.
Often times it seems rude to set strict boundaries and stick to them... but if you really love your brothers in Christ, you will hold them to it out of respect.
We need to set boundaries, and hold to them. Here's why:
Proverbs 2:16-19
To deliver thee from the strange woman, even from the stranger which flattereth with her words;
Which forsaketh the guide of her youth, and forgetteth the covenant of her God.
For her house inclineth unto death, and her paths unto the dead.
None that go unto her return again, neither take they hold of the paths of life.
Notice anything there? "Which flattereth with her words" this girl says what she thinks others want to hear. She's not holding to strict standards... "forsaketh the guide of her youth; and forgetteth the covenant of her God."
Proverbs 5:3-6
For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil:
But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.
Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.
Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, that thou canst not know them.
Once you let down your guard, and start talking the way you think is most likely to be accepted, your standards are clouded, and you soon forget them. Not meaning to, it just happens. Once you forget your standards your ways become "moveable" and cause others to stumble.
It's very easy to be a strange woman. It's being a virtuous woman that is hard. It goes against our human nature. It's easier to just say what you know others want to hear, rather than risk starting a debate. But....
Proverbs 31:10
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
Proverbs 31:25-26
Strength and honor are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
So, back to the original question... What am I doing?
From here on out, I intend to really study, and seek wisdom, knowledge and understanding. I'm going to put more thought into what I am doing, and where it is leading, not only me, but others under my influence. And I'm going to try harder at being submissive to my Dad.
This is not a time where we can sit back and wait for things to change... we need to think, and work hard. But most of all pray hard. There is so much to be done for the Kingdom! A lot of things are being left undone because we are being careless about our role as women. Most of all as sisters and daughters.
Proverbs 31:29-31
Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou exellest them all.
Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
Father help me to be faithful in all things....
Ever since I was little I've had a burden for guys. I've had a burden to help them, be a comfort to them, be a sister to them.... but in wanting to be those things, I didn't bother to learn how to be any of those things.
It has become more and more evident to me how crucial the role of a woman is in the Kingdom. It bothers me more and more to see the way our role as women is being abused... not by the men - it's us women abusing it.
I've always had a dislike for the way girls carry on so about the silliest things.... (I know, I do it often *is working on that*) so my way of getting away from it was to go out and "be one of the guys" playing tag, football, you name it. My solution to the problem I saw, was to shirk my duty as a young lady and try to be a boy.
Getting into my teens, I saw that being "one of the guys" as far as playing their rough games probably wasn't the best idea... so I got to the place of just talking to them as if I was one of them. Thinking that it would somehow be an encouragement to them.... had another think coming.
It began to dawn on me that just talking to the guys as if I were one of them wasn't doing a lick of good. Guys need girls to be girls. Not men.
By being tough and unfeeling we don't do them any good. So I went to the extreme of being "soft" to the point of not standing up for what I know to be right. Not holding to strict standards in conversation... which is almost more harmful than trying to be a guy. And in the process hurt some people, and was myself, deeply hurt by others.
What is it to be a true woman.... by God's standard? What attributes does a godly woman have? What am I doing?
1) Sobriety.
1 Timothy 2:9-10
In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
Sorry, but silliness isn't needed. Sure, it's fun to goof off at times. But when it's all the time, that's when it becomes a problem. But we need to understand there is a difference between silly, and levity.
Levity is having good, clean, honest fun. Truly enjoying yourself, with others if the situation allows for it, but not dependent on the presence of others.
Silliness is obnoxious. It's overbearing. It's often disgusting.
2 Timothy 3:5-7
Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.
For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,
Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
I'm sorry, but that doesn't sound appealing to me... which brings me to the next point.
2) Knowledge.
Proverbs 1:5-7
A wise man will hear, and will increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels:
To understand a proverb, and the interpretation; the words of the wise, and their dark sayings.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction.
Being a lady doesn't mean sitting aside looking pretty, not bothering our "pretty heads" with anything other than the latest gossip. We're wives and mothers in training. (some have made it through training and are now putting what they've learned into practice)
Our homes are a shambles ladies: and we're to blame. No, we can't blame it on the last generation. We can't say "If Mom had been a better mom" or "Mom never taught me that" big whoop. Chances are your mom didn't know about it to teach you. It's called "due diligence" look in the Bible, find what your role as a woman is, and learn it. No one can make you learn anything. It has to be you.
The way women are today is our problem. We can't wait for others to get their act together; we need to get our act together. To go on as is isn't fair to the guys, and it's not pleasing to God.
Proverbs 2:3-6
Yea, if thou criest after knowledge, and liftest up thy voice for understanding;
If thou seekest her as silver, and searchest for her as for hid treasures;
Then shalt thou understand the fear of the Lord, and find the knowledge of God.
For the Lord giveth wisdom: out of His mouth cometh knowledge and understanding.
3) Wisdom.
Proverbs 4:7
Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.
Proverbs 2:1-2
My son, if thou wilt receive my words, and hide my commandments with thee;
So that thou incline thine ear unto wisdom, and apply thine heart to understanding;
Proverbs 1:2-4
To know wisdom and instruction; to perceive the words of understanding;
To receive the instruction of wisdom, justice, and judgement, and equity;
To give subtilty to the simple, to the young man knowledge and discretion.
Proverbs 7:4
Say unto wisdom, Thou art my sister; and call understanding thy kinswoman:
Knowledge is great.... but utterly useless without the wisdom to use it. Wisdom is something that is greatly lacking in today's society. Let's not add to the problem.
Proverbs 3:7
Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the Lord, and depart from evil.
4) Understanding.
Proverbs 2:9-11
Then shalt thou understand righteousness, and judgment, and equity; yea, every good path.
When wisdom entereth into thine heart, and knowledge is pleasant unto thy soul;
Discretion shall preserve thee, understanding shall keep thee:
Proverbs 3:3-5
Let not mercy and truth forsake thee: bind them about thy neck; write them upon the table of thine heart:
So shalt thou find favor and good understanding in the sight of God and man.
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
We can better serve the Father when we understand our surroundings. We can't fight a battle we don't understand.
5) Submission.
Ephesians 5:22
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Colossians 3:18
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
What about those of us who aren't married yet? Does this mean we can do whatever we want until we're married?
All those rebellious wives you see around you.... started out as rebellions daughters. Likewise, most faithful wives you see, started out as faithful daughters.
As daughters we need to practice submission, by submitting to our Dad's. No matter what sort of "quirky" ideas he has... what makes you think your husband won't have similar quirks?
6) Instruction.
Part of submission is accepting instruction....
Proverbs 1:8-9
My son; hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother:
For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck.
I could go on forever about all this... there is so much to know. So much to learn. So much to do.
I'm tired of going from one extreme to the other. I'm tired of hurting people, and being hurt, because I didn't hold myself to the highest standards, or hold the guy to strict boundaries because I didn't think about it. One can not go through life mindlessly going with the flow... there is so much more to life.
Often times it seems rude to set strict boundaries and stick to them... but if you really love your brothers in Christ, you will hold them to it out of respect.
We need to set boundaries, and hold to them. Here's why:
Proverbs 2:16-19
To deliver thee from the strange woman, even from the stranger which flattereth with her words;
Which forsaketh the guide of her youth, and forgetteth the covenant of her God.
For her house inclineth unto death, and her paths unto the dead.
None that go unto her return again, neither take they hold of the paths of life.
Notice anything there? "Which flattereth with her words" this girl says what she thinks others want to hear. She's not holding to strict standards... "forsaketh the guide of her youth; and forgetteth the covenant of her God."
Proverbs 5:3-6
For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil:
But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.
Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.
Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, that thou canst not know them.
Once you let down your guard, and start talking the way you think is most likely to be accepted, your standards are clouded, and you soon forget them. Not meaning to, it just happens. Once you forget your standards your ways become "moveable" and cause others to stumble.
It's very easy to be a strange woman. It's being a virtuous woman that is hard. It goes against our human nature. It's easier to just say what you know others want to hear, rather than risk starting a debate. But....
Proverbs 31:10
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
Proverbs 31:25-26
Strength and honor are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
So, back to the original question... What am I doing?
From here on out, I intend to really study, and seek wisdom, knowledge and understanding. I'm going to put more thought into what I am doing, and where it is leading, not only me, but others under my influence. And I'm going to try harder at being submissive to my Dad.
This is not a time where we can sit back and wait for things to change... we need to think, and work hard. But most of all pray hard. There is so much to be done for the Kingdom! A lot of things are being left undone because we are being careless about our role as women. Most of all as sisters and daughters.
Proverbs 31:29-31
Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou exellest them all.
Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
Father help me to be faithful in all things....
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Musings From A Swordmaiden
I've always been taught that girls have no place in wars. Girls were not made to be in combat. While that is true, this post is all about how girls can, and should be warriors... in another way. (but it is in no way limited to girls)
Fear, pride and in essence, self; all must be battled. This is an inner struggle. It's a battle we fight over, and over again. There is no reprieve. There is no "calling a truce". It's a constant, hard struggle.
When you think about it... these aren't each different fronts... they all connect somehow.
Fear stems from pride, pride from selfishness, and sometimes selfishness from fear...
So now. How do we fight it? The answer is simple - but hard to do.
Just like in a real physical battle, the plan may be fairly simple, but the battle itself is hard.
Prayer is simple, right? Just get down on your knees and ask God to take away your problems and make you like Him, right? Now if only it was easy to do...
But you know something? That's not all there is to it.
Prayer is a constant hard fight. We're not simply handing our sword to God and saying "I'm tired, You're better at this anyway, please win this war for me". We're asking Him to lead us into battle, but we still have to fight it.
We still have to learn not to fear, and not be prideful.
The only way to win this war is by dying.
There has to be balance in this battle.
We cannot simply "come to terms" with where we're at, and not let things bother us anymore. We must ever strive for excellence in all things! But at the same time learn to be content with where we're at right now.
Contentment is not pining away for circumstances to be different so we can do things better. Contentment is learning to work with what we've been given, and make the best of it for God's glory!
We can't just ask God one time to "fix us" and let it go. This is daily praying for His guidance and strength for the day. Daily dying to self. Daily taking up our cross, and following Him.
What does it mean to follow Him? Was His path smooth always? Did He wait until circumstances were perfect before using them to glorify the Father?
It's pretty obvious He didn't have everything perfect for what He had to do. But He did the Father's will regardless of circumstances.
What are we doing? More specifically, what am I doing with what I have been given?
Sure, some times it seems we don't have all we need to do the work God has given. It seems we don't have the strength to continue fighting... but Deuteronomy 33:25 says: Thy shoes shall be iron and brass; and as thy days, so shall thy strength be.
Day By Day ~ Karolina W. Sandell-Berg
Day by day, and with each passing moment,
Strength I find, to meet my trials here;
Trusting in my Father's wise bestowment,
I've no cause for worry or for fear.
He Whose heart is kind beyond all measure
Gives unto each day what He deems best -
Lovingly, it's part of pain and pleasure,
Mingling toil with peace and rest.
Every day, the Lord Himself is near me
With a special mercy for each hour;
All my cares He fain would bear, and cheer me,
He Whose Name is Counselor and Pow'r.
The protection of His child and treasure
Is a charge that on Himself He laid;
"As thy days, thy strength shall be in measure,"
This the pledge to me He made.
Help me then in every tribulation
So to trust Thy promises, O Lord,
That I lose not faith's sweet consolation
Offered me within Thy holy Word.
Help me, Lord, when toil and trouble meeting,
E'er to take, as from a father's hand,
One by one, the days, the moments fleeting,
Till I reach the promised land.
It's easy to feel despondent. It's easy to feel sorry for yourself and make excuses. But did Christ ever do that? When He felt down, He went straight to God in prayer.
"Is the servant greater than the Master, that I should say 'Exempt me from this trial'? No!" Christ is our example, we should bring dishonor to His spotless Name were we to shrink from following His standard!
A Flag To Follow
I sought a flag to follow,
A cause for which to stand,
I sought a valiant leader
Who could my love command;
I sought a stirring challenge,
Some noble work to try,
To give my life fulfillment,
My dreams to satisfy.
Chorus:
I found them all in Jesus,
The Life, the Truth, the Way;
Beneath His flag I'll take my stand
And follow Him today.
I'll follow Him today!
I sought a ringing answer
For all my doubts inside,
A torch of truth uplifted,
Me searching steps to guide;
I sought a word of wisdom,
A true authority,
I sought to know life's purpose,
To solve its mystery.
I sought for satisfaction
For yearnings deep within,
I sought for full deliv'rance
From chains of guilt and sin;
I sought for peace and pardon,
For freedom from my fears,
I sought a hope to cling to
Beyond these passing years.
The whole point in being a warrior fighting battles, is to win ground for the king! If the soldiers are undisciplined we can't be certain of victory.
Yes, God wins. He always wins. But we are His army. We must be well disciplined soldiers marching out to battle!
Mighty Lord, Extend Your Kingdom
Mighty Lord, extend Your kingdom,
Be the truth with triumph crowned;
Let the lands that sit in darkness
Hear the glorious Gospel sound,
From out borders, From our borders,
To the world's remotest bound.
By Your arm, eternal Father,
Scatter far the shades of night;
Let the great Immanuel's kingdom
Open like the morning light;
Let all barriers, Let all barriers,
Yield before Your heavenly might.
Come in all Your Spirit's power;
Come, Your reign on earth restore;
In Your strength ride forth and conquer,
Still advancing more and more,
Till all people, Till all people,
Shall Your holy Name adore.
Inner struggles are so hard! But we can't give up. God is still on the throne! We're still enrolled in His army. We still have a war to win.
The only way we'll be of any use in the Kingdom is to die to self, live for Christ, serve others, and care for others above ourselves.
We still have many deaths to die for the sake of Christ and His Kingdom.
Let's take up our cross and follow Him. Follow where He leads. He leads into battle; not only against the outward foe, but against the inner foe - ourselves: our sinful human nature.
The first step to advancing the Kingdom is to be well trained, well disciplined soldiers. Willing soldiers who will spend our days in fervent prayer for the Great Cause, and for others in our circles of influence.
Regardless of circumstances, each one of us has something of influence on those around us. Are we using that influence wisely? Are we content? Are we striving for excellence? Are we disciplined?
There's so much to being a warrior. Prayer is a battle that is rarely seen, but is so important, and is a constant, desperate fight.
Being a prayer warrior isn't for weaklings.
Onward Christian soldiers!
Hallie
Fear, pride and in essence, self; all must be battled. This is an inner struggle. It's a battle we fight over, and over again. There is no reprieve. There is no "calling a truce". It's a constant, hard struggle.
When you think about it... these aren't each different fronts... they all connect somehow.
Fear stems from pride, pride from selfishness, and sometimes selfishness from fear...
So now. How do we fight it? The answer is simple - but hard to do.
Just like in a real physical battle, the plan may be fairly simple, but the battle itself is hard.
Prayer is simple, right? Just get down on your knees and ask God to take away your problems and make you like Him, right? Now if only it was easy to do...
But you know something? That's not all there is to it.
Prayer is a constant hard fight. We're not simply handing our sword to God and saying "I'm tired, You're better at this anyway, please win this war for me". We're asking Him to lead us into battle, but we still have to fight it.
We still have to learn not to fear, and not be prideful.
The only way to win this war is by dying.
There has to be balance in this battle.
We cannot simply "come to terms" with where we're at, and not let things bother us anymore. We must ever strive for excellence in all things! But at the same time learn to be content with where we're at right now.
Contentment is not pining away for circumstances to be different so we can do things better. Contentment is learning to work with what we've been given, and make the best of it for God's glory!
We can't just ask God one time to "fix us" and let it go. This is daily praying for His guidance and strength for the day. Daily dying to self. Daily taking up our cross, and following Him.
What does it mean to follow Him? Was His path smooth always? Did He wait until circumstances were perfect before using them to glorify the Father?
It's pretty obvious He didn't have everything perfect for what He had to do. But He did the Father's will regardless of circumstances.
What are we doing? More specifically, what am I doing with what I have been given?
Sure, some times it seems we don't have all we need to do the work God has given. It seems we don't have the strength to continue fighting... but Deuteronomy 33:25 says: Thy shoes shall be iron and brass; and as thy days, so shall thy strength be.
Day By Day ~ Karolina W. Sandell-Berg
Day by day, and with each passing moment,
Strength I find, to meet my trials here;
Trusting in my Father's wise bestowment,
I've no cause for worry or for fear.
He Whose heart is kind beyond all measure
Gives unto each day what He deems best -
Lovingly, it's part of pain and pleasure,
Mingling toil with peace and rest.
Every day, the Lord Himself is near me
With a special mercy for each hour;
All my cares He fain would bear, and cheer me,
He Whose Name is Counselor and Pow'r.
The protection of His child and treasure
Is a charge that on Himself He laid;
"As thy days, thy strength shall be in measure,"
This the pledge to me He made.
Help me then in every tribulation
So to trust Thy promises, O Lord,
That I lose not faith's sweet consolation
Offered me within Thy holy Word.
Help me, Lord, when toil and trouble meeting,
E'er to take, as from a father's hand,
One by one, the days, the moments fleeting,
Till I reach the promised land.
It's easy to feel despondent. It's easy to feel sorry for yourself and make excuses. But did Christ ever do that? When He felt down, He went straight to God in prayer.
"Is the servant greater than the Master, that I should say 'Exempt me from this trial'? No!" Christ is our example, we should bring dishonor to His spotless Name were we to shrink from following His standard!
A Flag To Follow
I sought a flag to follow,
A cause for which to stand,
I sought a valiant leader
Who could my love command;
I sought a stirring challenge,
Some noble work to try,
To give my life fulfillment,
My dreams to satisfy.
Chorus:
I found them all in Jesus,
The Life, the Truth, the Way;
Beneath His flag I'll take my stand
And follow Him today.
I'll follow Him today!
I sought a ringing answer
For all my doubts inside,
A torch of truth uplifted,
Me searching steps to guide;
I sought a word of wisdom,
A true authority,
I sought to know life's purpose,
To solve its mystery.
I sought for satisfaction
For yearnings deep within,
I sought for full deliv'rance
From chains of guilt and sin;
I sought for peace and pardon,
For freedom from my fears,
I sought a hope to cling to
Beyond these passing years.
The whole point in being a warrior fighting battles, is to win ground for the king! If the soldiers are undisciplined we can't be certain of victory.
Yes, God wins. He always wins. But we are His army. We must be well disciplined soldiers marching out to battle!
Mighty Lord, Extend Your Kingdom
Mighty Lord, extend Your kingdom,
Be the truth with triumph crowned;
Let the lands that sit in darkness
Hear the glorious Gospel sound,
From out borders, From our borders,
To the world's remotest bound.
By Your arm, eternal Father,
Scatter far the shades of night;
Let the great Immanuel's kingdom
Open like the morning light;
Let all barriers, Let all barriers,
Yield before Your heavenly might.
Come in all Your Spirit's power;
Come, Your reign on earth restore;
In Your strength ride forth and conquer,
Still advancing more and more,
Till all people, Till all people,
Shall Your holy Name adore.
Inner struggles are so hard! But we can't give up. God is still on the throne! We're still enrolled in His army. We still have a war to win.
The only way we'll be of any use in the Kingdom is to die to self, live for Christ, serve others, and care for others above ourselves.
We still have many deaths to die for the sake of Christ and His Kingdom.
Let's take up our cross and follow Him. Follow where He leads. He leads into battle; not only against the outward foe, but against the inner foe - ourselves: our sinful human nature.
The first step to advancing the Kingdom is to be well trained, well disciplined soldiers. Willing soldiers who will spend our days in fervent prayer for the Great Cause, and for others in our circles of influence.
Regardless of circumstances, each one of us has something of influence on those around us. Are we using that influence wisely? Are we content? Are we striving for excellence? Are we disciplined?
There's so much to being a warrior. Prayer is a battle that is rarely seen, but is so important, and is a constant, desperate fight.
Being a prayer warrior isn't for weaklings.
Onward Christian soldiers!
Hallie
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)